Bank of America Forecloses on Florida Home. Big Deal. (Oops, Wrong House.)

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Charlie and Maria Cardoso pleaded with Bank of America to not foreclose on their home in Florida, but the bank said there was nothing that could be done.  So, the bank foreclosed on the property, forced out the tenants, stripped the house, and changed the locks.

It was to be the Cardoso’s retirement home in sunny Florida.  They had used their savings to buy it a few years ago.  Three bedrooms and a pool.  Mrs. Cardosa put a lot of love into the home.  She cried when the bank told them they were evicting the tenants and taking all of her belongings to storage.

They tried and tried to make the bank understand that they should not be foreclosing on their dream retirement home, but the arrogant pricks at Bank of America, or as it ‘s more appropriately called, “The House that Lewis Broke,” let their pleas fall on deaf ears.  Nothing could be done… it’s the bank and they have every right to foreclose… the bankers undoubtedly thought to themselves.

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There was just one small, little, tiny, almost insignificant problem… the Cardosa’s owned the home free and clear.  Bank of America had no mortgage on the home.  They meant to foreclose on a home down the street… the numbers on a court document were wrong.  But they went ahead and did it anyway, even after repeatedly being told by the Charlie and Maria Cardosa that they were wrong and that they had no right to throw out their tenants and take their belongings.

Now Bank of America is being sued for $500,000, which if I were on that jury would only be the tip of the iceberg for punitive damages, if they were allowed.  Let’s see… can we award them $500 million?  If so, let’s.  How much was Kenny Lewis’ retirement bonus?  Let’s award them that amount and let’s also buy them a home next door to Kenny’s pad.

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Maria Cardosa says now her friends all think she was lying when she told them she and her husband had paid off the home and owned it free and clear.  I can’t imagine why they’d think that, can you?

Charlie Cardosa thinks that the bank at least owes him an apology for foreclosing on his free and clear home, tossing out his tenants, and removing all of his stuff and changing the locks… but fat chance of that ever happening.

Bank of America responded by saying that they have not yet been served with a lawsuit and do not comment on pending legislation.  And I’m not making that part up or anything.

These guys at Bank of America need to be neutered.  They bankrupted themselves, we gave them access to zillions in free capital and billions in TARP funds… and now get this:

According to the Washington Post…

Bank of America said its personnel expenses for 2009 totalled $31.5 billion, up from $18.4 billion in the previous year payroll.  The average pay per employee was up 45 percent, to roughly $111,000.

And check this out… just one week ago:

Bank of America lost $5.2 billion… FOR THE 4th QUARTER OF 2009, blaming the loss on more people not paying their credit card bills and the fact that they paid back some of the government TARP money, which they said they had to do in order to… wait for it… remove the limits on executive compensation!

Yay!  Yipee! Yahoo!  Isn’t this starting to be kind of spectacularly fun?  I’m absolutely loving it to death.  Are you kidding me?

“So, Mommy…how do you get rich?

“Why that’s easy honey… first you bankrupt your own bank, then you start throwing people out of their homes whether you own them or not… and then you give everyone a raise!  It’s capitalism, honey.  You’ll understand it when you’re older… assuming you grow up to be a banker.”

“But Mom, I’m no good with numbers.”

“Oh, that’s perfectly okay dear… you don’t have to be good with numbers to be a banker, silly.  Lot’s of underachievers are bankers.  That’s why this country is called the land of opportunity.”

Okay, so don’t make too big a deal about this… it was obviously a mistake and I’m totally confident that it’s the only mistake Bank of America has ever made. Aren’t you?

Bank of America… too stupid to listen… to big to flail.

Does anyone still bank there?  Why?

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